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ARTICLES
Listening for understanding
How To Listen for UNDERSTANDING
Recent research carried out in America amongst the fortune 500 companies found that the most important leadership qualities were
LISTENING
to and
UNDERSTANDING
the
NEEDS, FEELINGS and IDEAS
of others.
It really is very difficult to listen well, and yet it is the most important of the four basic communication skills.
Why is it so difficult? Well, it could be that we don’t even think of it as a skill – it just happens! If you consider the amount of time we spent at school learning how to read, write and speak you will probably calculate something like
6 – 8 Years learning how to write
1-2 Years learning how to speak (again, it is taken for granted)
0 – 6 Months learning how to listen
During the communication process we need to be able to:
• Identify key messages
• Read between the lines
• Understand non-verbal signals
Lots of things can get in the way of this:
• Lack of interest in what the speaker is saying
• Don’t need to know
• Dislike the speaker’s accent
• Prejudices
• Hunger, or some other discomfort
• Noisy environment
• Rushing to get to a meeting
How To Listen for UNDERSTANDING
The following tips will help you become a better listener, and thus a better communicator:
Be aware of the challenges you face when you are listening to Tough Types. Fear can get in the way of listening when Tom the Tyrant starts talking, and it’s easy to switch off when Andrew the Analyser takes hours rather than minutes to put over his point of view.
Edgar the Expert is often difficult to relate to and Winifred the Whiner’s complaints are rarely something you want to hear.
Woolly words like Maybe, Mostly, Probably, Basically, Around, Essentially – need to be probed. Otherwise, a colleague who makes an appointment to see you around 10.00 can have you waiting for them to turn up between 9.30 and 10.30.
It’s very easy to mishear messages on the telephone, and also face to face on some occasions. The following phrases will help you to clarify your speaker’s meaning:
“I’m not sure I understand this. Can you repeat what you first said?”
“Tell me more about the meeting. You say it helped you understand the company aims?”
“What exactly is it that you do not like about my report?”
Watch out for evasiveness in eye contact when you are trying to get to the root of a problem, and if you are giving a presentation, and the audience gets restless, are you listening?
Copyright 2007 - Anne McDougall
Innovate Through Training and Development
Anne McDougall
